How can you be sure the person you want to marry is the one

This is an intriguing question that has been asked severally by the singles that are searching and those about to Wed. As a matter of fact I am not an exception.

I was browsing online when I read this interesting post, I couldn’t let it go untouched in dimensions. It would be of great benefit to lots.

The question– Is there actually ‘The One’😮? Times without number I have come across people asking this questions and my answer has always been wait and see, and I hope no one will have to wait forever to find out. Tim Dawes, Consultant and Trainer for Communications, negotiations and influence analysed his experience supported by The actual algebra of Finding Your Soulmate. Please check it out.

Tim says, first you won’t like either one of them. First they aren’t the one. Accept that there is no no one or at least chances of you finding them is astronomical. So you likely won’t find the one. He said that doesn’t mean the person you marry won’t be special.

This is the story of how Tim found his true love.

He met her at a party after he had sworn off women after the n- teenth time. She walked in and told me she was here to spike the punch, and I was smitten. She was different from any other woman he had ever met or could imagine as a partner. But we didn’t marry for three years, because we both wanted to see how we were going to be treated by the other and I think that’s the key to finding the one for you. Find someone you are both attracted to and who will treat you the way you want to be treated for long term.

According to Tim that is someone who wants to be clean in communications, who wants to work things out immediately rather than carry them around silently. When I saw that in her, I found someone I was knocked out by, who I thought would give me years of closeness. Both are still true today. Twenty six years after.

According to my own opinion, The one is that lady or that man you decide to choose out of everyone, to have faith in, be consistent in working things out with together, the one you will be willing to love and spend the rest of your life with regardless of the challenges. This is the person that strikes your inner being with sunshine.

Your kind comments and contributions are welcome.





27 thoughts on “How can you be sure the person you want to marry is the one”

  1. I would suggest that “the one” may be “the one” at that point in time and space, but life is always in flux. People change, and sometimes they don’t grow together, but apart. The challenge isn’t in finding “the one”, but in maintaining the relationship. My two cents. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I believe there is “the one”. Because I’ve found mine. It’s not been perfect, and we’ve had our share of trials. The difference between loving someone a lot and them being “the one” is that it’s not hard to maintain, in spite of tribulations.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Maintaining the relationship is truly the focus here. That’s were communication becomes paramount. Thanks for the suggestion Rob😉


  4. Okey dokey; here goes…

    So i used to have a theory. It wasn’t well thought out. I ‘believed’ that every person had a kindred spirit. That somewhere in the world was your absolute perfect match. You wouldn’t necessarily meet them or see them or anything, but they were out there somewhere.

    Now I’m older and uglier, I believe that idea to be utter nonsense! Nobody is meant for anybody. Nobody is anybody’s ‘one’. You get in relationships and you either work together or you don’t. If you don’t then you either fight hard and change to adapt better to the person you’re with or you call it a day. The reason for that is because relationships and marriage are not natural. They’re a conscious human concept. We choose relationships; nature doesn’t. Nature gives us the means to reproduce only. What we do from there is totally up to us.

    So when you meet a person who won’t entertain a relationship with anybody it’s because they’re more in touch with their natural instincts than those who simply must have a significant other. That’s not to say either one is wrong. It’s entirely up to you at the end of the day. But people who claim to have met the ‘one’ are pretty deluded in my opinion when you consider there are 7 billion other people out there…

    And that’s my two pence. Haha

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Wow. This is wonderful Paul. I have so much to learn from your intelligence. I love every point you made. As you said it’s entirely up to the individual, I believe you meant it’s a choice to make at the end of the day..I really need to sit and assimilate your point. Fight hard to make sure things work out..( perfect). Thanks so much for your input💝

    Liked by 1 person

  6. In my opinion if you have to ask yourself “are they the one?” They’re probably not. I was never the marrying kind until I laid eyes on my wife for the first time. I leaned over to a friend and said im going to marry that girl. They laughed but here we are 5 years (on the 11th of November) later happily married. I thought I wasn’t the marrying kind but I just hadn’t found the kind I wanted to marry. You just know when you’re onto a good thing.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Yay that’s awesome, just a few days to your wedding anniversary🎈 So wonderful of you to share your experience. It’s quite encouraging too😊 Thanks for your contribution.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I have to agree with The V Pub. I think over the course of a lifetime, there can hundreds of “the ones” for every stage of life we find ourselves in! But I believe the key to monotony, longevity, and happiness requires both people over the course of a lifetime to continue devoting themselves to each other’s happiness. If you find someone who is willing to do that, and you’re willing to do that too, then you’ve both found the one!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. This may be another good question for me to think about for my podcast. But I think that many of us can find the one that is meant for us. You can say that there are other people that you can be attracted to for a number of different reasons. You can say that there may be someone else for you after the death of or (God forbid for me) divorce from a spouse. This is all hypothetical though because you cannot truly no until you cross paths with this other person.

    Anyhow, I think that when you run into “the one,” this person changes something about you in some way, shape, or form. I know when my wife came along, she changed what I had envisioned myself being with. I had thought of females in other way before she came along. Another thing is that even when I tried to break up the relationship, something turned us back to each other. I love my wife just as much now as I did when we were dating. Now, it has been 8 years together and 5 years of marriage. She is the one for me. I don’t worry about some hypothetical person.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. That’s so inspiring. Thanks for sharing it here, I’m grateful and yes you can go ahead to talk about this topic on your podcast. I’m glad your wife was able to change what you had envisioned yourself being💞

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I’m taking away a lot from this post because I totally agree with Tim especially where he says “the key to finding the one for you. Find someone you are both attracted to and who will treat you the way you want to be treated for long term.”

    All relationships have their phases. Don’t always be in a hurry to jump the gun.

    Liked by 1 person

I would love to hear your thoughts! Thanks! ♥

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.