Tag Archives: esteem

How Do I Overcome Pain Of Rejection

I know how it feels to be rejected because it’s like being stabbed. The pain is so intense; you feel the urge to close your eyes and end it right there. I’ve been turned down many times in my life, in all areas such as in relationships, educational affairs, friendship…. name it. Not that they hated me but life has a way of pushing us around to mold us together to become stronger, independent, upright and be who we should be.

The pain of rejection is something we have all felt on many occasions, no matter how much we try to avoid it, trust me it’s inevitable and then we ask ‘why me’??

We feel rejected when we underestimate ourselves,

Have high expectations from people,

Have low esteem and fear criticism…

All this is normal but when it keeps going on in a vicious circle, then I would say “that’s bad for your health.” No one is built in perfection but everyone has the space to accept good, sensible correction to be a better person.

To overcome the pain of rejection is one of the most difficult things to do but I conquered it and there’s been no turning back. I’ve discovered the freedom of expression it brings, confidence in love affairs, the charisma that attracts genuine people and success.

How do I overcome pain of rejection

In a short sentence, to overcome the pain of rejection and flee from it – DEFINE WHO YOU ARE…

Caring about what people think of you is useless.

Most people don’t even know what they think of themselves.

– Sonya Teclai

 

Image Credit: Pixabay & Google

 

 

 

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Do Women Really Fall for Flattery?

Over the years, there has been a saying that ” If you want a woman to comply to your requests, try using flattery to persuade her.” Really I wonder if every or any man can get away with this with all women. It may have worked a couple of times, in fact it has worked 98 percent of the time used.  Flattery plays well with women. YES!  But it doesn’t sit still. She will always refer back to it.

Hank Ketcham- Flattery is like chewing gum. Enjoy it, but don’t swallow it.

Perhaps women have been complying with this over the years.

Flattery is the worst and fastest way of showing our esteem – Jonathan Swift

Flattery is a form of positive energy which men use to compliment or entice women when they need an instant result from them; it’s usually used instead of enforcing them to bend to their will.

Forms of Flattery used on women by men:

  • Men flatter women with words, lies, compliments and gestures.
  • Listening attentively to a woman talk for hours, even when she sounds very boring.
  • Pretending to have turned a new leaf by acting like a saint or being over sincere.
  • Showing interests in her accomplishments even if they make no sense to him.

A woman care about actions more than words, empty juicy flattery with nothing to back it up will only get her to pay attention initially, but will not go too far with her.

Boost Your Self Confidence

I have heard of several instances where self esteem is a problem for so many, it has degenerated to a level so high in the life of an individual that they feel they can’t overcome it. It advances with them to adulthood to the extent that some people find it so hard to perform well in interviews, it makes some people avoid socializing, some find it so difficult to do things that will make them happy-because they think they will never be approved of.

It usually arises from early growth, where parents are being overprotective of the child; criticism is also an element, when a child is being pushed to hard, it makes him loose confidence, parents who criticize their children over every little detail or failure are not only killing their confidence but are also crippling their spirit.We as humans will take cognisance of it and decide to use it then bullying sets in.This can only maim an individual development, self esteem, self knowledge and growth. We don’t want this to happen to any of our loved one…

If you grew up this way, it’s never too late to get out of that bondage, that is what is seems to be…Think positive, be optimistic, never allow criticism get to you. People can’t bring you down, they can only try. Don’t allow your feelings be toyed with, you are the determinant of how people treat you, live your heart into their hands, then you are already under their control for manipulation.

Enhancing your self esteem will pave way in facing challenges, it helps you to meet the right people in the right social gathering, It helps you in development of your writing skills and not giving up in what you believe in no matter how many times you fail at it. You want to blog? You want to publish a book? You want to sing? Why not just take one step of confidence today and try whatever is bugging your mind and giving you sleepless nights as long as its’ not a bad thing…

How do you build self confidence? Say to yourself everyday,”I will try harder today, I will be confident today.” Be bold, take informed risks, challenge yourself, love yourself, always remind yourself that you want to succeed at whatever you do but you can only achieve it through confidence. Don’t be too hard on yourself.

Today is Monday! Be confident in achieving success at whatever you will embark on.

Xoxo